Alaskan Advent

Advent is by far my favorite season of the church year. I love Advent more than I love Christmas. Advent is the season of watching and waiting, preparing for the birth of Christ and the coming of Christ again in a new way in our lives.

I grew up in a small American Baptist church, Church of the Covenant in Palmer, Alaska. Church of the Covenant was not big on liturgical seasons--I don't remember observing Lent, but I do remember observing Advent. I remember lighting the candles all four weeks of Advent (two purple, one pink, another purple, then the Christ candle on Christmas Eve). I remember singing the Advent carols of "Come, Thou Long Expected Jesus" and "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel." While some, like the former, are uplifting, many of the Advent carols are dark and foreboding, like the latter.

Advent is seen as a season that parallels Lent, as the church leads up to Easter, so Advent leads to Christmas and Epiphany (Epiphany takes place after the 12 days of Christmas, on January 6th, and commemorates the revealing of Christ to the world by the coming of the "Wise Men"). As people often think of Lent as a dark time, so Advent is a dark time, but in a different way. In Lent you have to go through the Cross to get to Easter. In Advent, we go through labor and birth. We read passages from the Old Testament prophets about hope, and from the Gospels we read passages of Jesus speaking of his coming again, of the birthpangs before God does something new. It is the preparation for the birth of Christ, the coming of God in this world in a new way.

In Alaska Advent marks the darkest time literally. Where I grew up in the Matanuska-Susitna Valley, the sun rises around 11AM and sets around 3:30PM. Because Alaska is so far north twilight is extended so the light begins to enter the skies around 9:30AM and it truly gets dark around 5PM. December 21st or 22nd (depending on your calendar) marks Winter Solstice, the longest night of the year.

Some churches have Longest Night or Blue Christmas services at this time for those who struggle during the holidays, for those who have lost loved ones around the holidays or for those for whom Christmas simply marks a difficult time of the year. Growing up, Solstice marked a celebration, a turning of events, the change of the tide, that light shines in the darkness and the darkness did not overcome it, and that the days will begin to get longer again.

I love everything about Advent--the carols, the lighting of the candles, the liturgical color of purple or dark blue, and the simple preparations for Christmas. I love Christmas Eve services, but they are one night once a year, whereas Advent lasts four weeks, four Sundays.

In many ways I wish they didn't sell Advent calendars at the stores, that just number 1 through 24 in December and often have a piece of candy hidden inside. Advent calendars simply mark the days down to Christmas. Advent in the church tells the story of what God has already done in the world and relives the promises of what God will do again.

The word Advent literally means "coming into view." As we wait for Christmas, we wait the coming into view of Christ into this world. We see signs all around--signs of hope and joy and love and peace. We await what is commonly called "the Second Coming," the coming of Christ into this world, into our lives in a new way.

Advent marks a time of actively watching and waiting for Christ in our lives and in our world to do a new thing. We do not passively sit back, but we take part in the Christian life: loving our neighbors, helping the poor, praying with the sick, participating in God's justice in our world. This has, in a way, sunk into the secular world as many people are called to give to charity. The commercialization of Christmas has caught hold and many of the charitable acts around this time of year involve giving toys, but there are others who give food, clothing, and shelter. There are those who visit nursing homes to sing Christmas Carols and visit people who are lonely. This is the active participation in the world that is called for by Advent.

As Christians, the season of Advent reminds us of what we should be doing all year long, actively watching and waiting for Christ's coming into our lives in a new way. As an Alaskan, in the "outside" now, I remember the snow, the lights in people's windows (by the way, I recall people hanging Christmas lights on the inside of their windows back in Alaska rather than the outside of their houses as they do in New England, due to the freezing temperatures). I remember driving around and just looking at Christmas lights. I remember drinking hot chocolate and listening to Christmas Carols while watching the snow fall. And I remember every Sunday evening lighting the Advent candles, and celebrating Winter Solstice and the end of the darkness. The light was coming again into our world.

Giving yourself the gift of time

Just in the past month I have started working out regularly again.

I was never an athletic kid. I liked to play basketball and tried out for teams in high school but was never good enough to make the cut. I played soccer for two years but again was never good enough to stay on varsity. I ran track in middle school and actually was a decent sprinter--at least I never came in last! I always have enjoyed hiking, too. But exercising regularly was never my thing.

During my youth I did not eat well. I brought lunch money to school and would buy a milkshake and curly fries instead. Once I could eat off-campus I would eat fast food. But even that wasn't as bad as the period of time when I would come home from school and eat four bowls of cereal, right in a row. My parents were divorcing in high school and I found comfort in food, and that has been my struggle ever since.

When I was 26 and had begun dating JC, we went on a hike in the Blue Hills. I had a hard time keeping up. I realized that something needed to change. Later that year, I began the South Beach Diet and lost 30 lbs. I was able to keep it off for a while but then it started to creep back on, so I got serious about exercising. I joined a gym soon after turning 27 and quickly became a gym rat, going 6 days a week. I was also engaged at the time and wanted to fit into my wedding dress! Because I worked out so much, even though my dress was fitted by a seamstress in mid-April, by the end of May when we got married, my dress was loose!

I was still able to keep my weight down after the wedding, but slowly that first year of marriage my weight crept back up. I still worked out regularly but it slipped to five days, then four days a week, then down to two. But what really happened was that I stopped caring about what I was eating again, what I was putting into my body and how much. By the time I was 28 I had gained back most of what I had lost before.

Seeing pictures of me on my 28th birthday motivated me to join Weight Watchers. Within 10 weeks I had lost most of the weight I had put back on and had recommitted to the gym to at least 4 days a week. By that spring, I was below my wedding weight and I was running 5K's regularly.

Then I plateaued. I got within two pounds of a milestone and couldn't get past it. I ran and worked out, but I couldn't get myself back on Weight Watchers to really look at what I was eating and why. I stayed at that weight until I became pregnant with AJ.

During the first two months of my pregnancy I still worked out regularly, though all of a sudden I became quite tired and remained very tired throughout my pregnancy. After my first doctor's appointment, I was advised to stop running and stop lifting weights. I ended up not working out very much at all during my pregnancy (though I continued to walk up until the last couple of weeks, when it was very hot in July and I was very tired!)

I gained quite a bit of weight when I was pregnant, but within a week of giving birth I had lost more than half (it helps when you give birth to a 9 lbs 5 oz baby boy!) I thought the rest would come off quickly, but it did not. I walked, I joined a post-partum aerobics class, and eventually I rejoined Weight Watchers, and lost all but fifteen pounds of my pregnancy weight.

I have plateaued once again, but I stopped working out this summer. AJ stopped sleeping through the night and I found sleeping in necessary to get through the day. Recently, though, as I have struggled to lose weight, I have found the one thing that has been getting in my way all along.

Time.

I have not been giving myself the gift of time, the gift of one hour a day to go to the gym and work out, the gift of stopping to think about what I am eating and why. Over the past few years my eating habits have changed. I am very conscience of getting in my fruits and vegetables and good carbohydrates, but I still eat out of boredom or for comfort. I have become more aware of my eating habits. But I need to give myself the time to be aware of what I am eating, to be aware of what I am doing with my time.

All too often, I feel that I can't give myself that time. I need to get to the office, I need to go visit someone, I need to be with my son. It has been five years since I first started working out, and over the past month as I have begun to work out at least four times a week again, I feel the pain in my knees, the stiffness and soreness in my muscles that wasn't there five years ago.

AJ is about 16 months now. It has gone by so fast and so have the past five years. Five years from now will go by in the blink of an eye.

If not now, then when?

I have to give myself the gift of time NOW. I have to give myself the time to work out and eat right and take care of myself because it's not going to get any easier. It's harder now than it was five years ago. It will be much harder five years from now.

I think a lot of us live this kind of lifestyle, especially in the clergy, where we just don't give ourselves the gift of time because we're too busy giving others our time. I know that when I work out in the morning, even if I'm tired during the day I'm still more alert than I am if I do not work out. If I don't work out I need a lot of caffeine, and I often consume more sugar to get through the day, whereas if I work out, the energy created keeps me going (I'll still have a bit of caffeine if tired, but not nearly as much).

It never gets easier, so if not now, then when? I know I can care best for others when I begin to care for myself. The same goes with spiritual self-care--if I take the time to pray and spend time in reflection, I am more in tune when others are going through spiritual crises and need pastoral guidance in their spiritual life.

The time is now. Give yourself that gift.

Health "Care" Reform--how about some political reform?

I have written on this subject in the past: http://rev-o-lution.blogspot.com/2009/09/our-health-care-system-part-2.html

As the current bill is being debated in the Senate, all I hear are voices from the left saying this has to be passed before Christmas (didn't last summer they say it had to be passed before August?) and voices on the right saying how they will wage a "holy war" on this bill. Frankly I'm just disgusted by it all.

There is no doubt we need health care reform in our country. One of my big pet peeves in the past of the whole debate is that those who do not agree with the bill being proposed refuse to offer an alternative. However, I have found this is not true: there are alternatives that have been proposed, including Representative Ryan's (R) proposal for covering Americans under employer insurance (though it does not include a public option, as he is opposed to that). But members of his own party will not support it.

The biggest problem in it all? The biggest obstacle health care reform faces? Here it is: the fact that every single member of Congress, Republican or Democrat or Independent, is running for re-election all the time and they simply do not care about the fact that people are dying in emergency rooms or waiting months to see their doctor just for routine visits. Maybe that's a bit harsh, but it's not far from the truth.

All I hear are Democrats saying we'll take our toys and go play without you and Republicans screaming NO NO NO without positively endorsing any alternative other than what we have, where millions are not covered and costs are out of control. Neither way is going to get us comprehensive health care reform.

While I will wait and hope some day for true universal healthcare coverage, where you don't need a referral, where you don't have to worry about budgeting thousands of dollars for what won't be covered by your insurance plan, I know that it is unlikely to come any time soon. And to be honest, after this week's hullabaloo about women's health in terms of breast cancer and cervical cancer screenings, I worry about the government telling us what is safe and what is not (though I have read extensively and agree that perhaps not all women need to be tested every year, but we should have the option, and we still should be taught how to perform self-breast exams, etc). I worry about what will be covered and what will be seen as unnecessary when it comes to my health.

However, right now I have those same exact fears with my insurance company. I worry about having future complications due to my difficult labor and delivery and infection and being denied coverage because it was pre-existing, as I prepare to move and switch health-care plans. I worry about doctors following insurance company guidelines to cut costs at the expense of my health.

I recently read a story of a woman being forced to have a C-section because her hospital refused to cover her VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean) even though she had already had one successful VBAC, and the statistics show the risk would be greater for her to have a repeat C-section rather than a VBAC, all because the hospital decided they needed less coverage in the Labor and Delivery department and could not cover an emergency C-section. However, any birth potentially could result in an emergency C-section, so the hospital's policy was not consistent. Rather, the cost-saving measure of having fewer nurses on duty and the cost charged to insurance companies for a C-section being much greater than a vaginal birth all seemed to be more important than the health of a mother and child.

I worry about the government making policy that will affect my health care, but it is already happening by for-profit insurance companies. And when Representatives and Senators accept contributions from such companies or any other powerful lobby group, I don't know how in the world we can trust them, or why we continue to re-elect them.

It is time to start working together and building a health care plan for everyone. It is time to stop playing politics and worrying about being re-elected. It's also time to stop blaming anyone, from President Obama to past presidents and start taking responsibility for actions now. I do not believe that the plans currently being considered by the House and Senate are exactly what President Obama had in mind when he set out to do health care reform. And I must remind people to go back to middle-school civics classes to recognize how little power the President has to make laws beyond executive orders--legislation comes from Congress. And as long as we have Representatives and Senators acting like third graders on the playground, we're going to have a third-grade level healthcare system, where the strongest and the fastest kids are picked and the rest are left out on the margins. I am sick of seeing grown men and women in Congress act so childish towards one another, calling one another names, boasting of their own accomplishments, when most of us are sitting in the waiting rooms, hoping we can get seen by our primary care physician, hoping that nothing is seriously wrong as we cannot afford more out-of-pocket expenses, hoping that we won't be denied coverage.

It is time for us to stand up and say enough is enough. We want to grow up and grow old and be well. We want to not be bankrupt for generations for this simple basic right to grow up healthy. There are alternatives to bickering and fighting. There are other options that need to be considered. We were all taught in elementary school how to share and how to work out compromises. It's not that hard to get to a plan for reasonable coverage for all, if that was truly what our Congress wants.

And if they don't, I hope we don't do what we always do, which is vote out the party in power and vote in another party. Instead, I'd like to see something radical, something new--vote out EVERY incumbent and start fresh. Wipe the slate clean. Vote in people who actually want to do their job and represent the people in their districts, regardless of party.

I can dream, can't I?

Spelling and Grammar from a Creative Writing Major

I have a degree in Creative Writing, with a minor in English Literature. I worked as a Writing Assistant in Linfield's Writing Center while I was a student there. I worked as an English Department Assistant for McMinnville High School in McMinnville, Oregon while at Linfield. I have proofread and edited many friend's papers over the years, including those of my spouse.

So you would think I have this all down by now.

I have had to edit my previous post twice now. Rebuttle is not a word, Rebuttal is. Hip-waders are what you wear in cold water, not hip-waiters (I wanted to spell it hip-weighters but Google Chrome underlined that one for me). Why oh why can I point out misspellings in other's writings but miss it in my own? Just last night I was reviewing copies of a new church structure document and realizing I had misused apostrophes all over the place, saying Deacon's instead of Deacons for pluralizing (just now while typing this I had to think hard about whether apostrophes, plural, needed an apostrophe before the s).

Spelling and grammar do not come easy for me, nor are they second-nature, as one might think. I love to write, but I still have to remember and relearn the basics all the time.

Perhaps spelling and grammar to me are the log in my eye (see Matthew 7:1-5). I clearly can see the specks all over other people's papers, but will miss them in mine. It's something I'm still working on.

An Alaskan Rebuttal

I haven't read Sarah Palin's book, nor do I plan on it, unless I can get it from the library, and even then, only maybe.

However, I have heard enough in the news, read enough online and listened enough on NPR to have a few comments. And my comments, surprisingly enough, are not directed at Sarah Palin, but at the media. Yes, I'm blaming the media on this one, but this is why:

For some reason, the media has picked on Sarah Palin for being quaint, for being folksy, for being, of all things, an Alaskan. And I take some offense to that.

I may not have learned how to field dress a moose, but I did learn how to gut fish by the stream. It's part of life in Alaska. It's not meant to gross you out or surprise you, it's just part of life. There are some who live in Alaska who do not fish or hunt, but they are very few.

A commentator on NPR yesterday made fun of Sarah Palin's referral to the rest of the United States as "outside." That is how ALL Alaskans refer to the other states, besides using the term, "Lower 48."

And Rachel Maddow on MSNBC a few months ago made fun of Sarah Palin wearing hip-waders. Palin and her family were coming out of a boat onto land along the Bering Sea. Anyone from Alaska would know that those waters were 40 degrees or colder, and of course you are going to wear hip-waders to protect yourself.

For all these funny little quirks and sayings that Palin has, most of them are part of the personality of Alaskans. And I guess it is ok to make fun of them, as long as I can continue to make fun of the fact that I have been asked by more than one person if I am an Eskimo, or told by more than one catalog company on the phone that they do not ship to foreign countries and include Alaska as part of it. I will continue to laugh so hard when people ask me if I rode a dogsled to school (nope, big yellow school bus just like everyone else), or if there is ice on the ground all the time (not when it is 70 in June, just like a lot of the lower 48).

There is enough for those who disagree with Palin to point out. There was a well-written fact check on Yahoo News by the Associated Press to point out where Palin has her facts completely wrong or mixed up. There are plenty of places to find fault in her logic and inconsistencies in her politics. To insult her Alaskan-ness just isn't nice, or frankly, intelligent.

I haven't lived in Alaska for a long time now, but I still call Alaska home. Much of my childhood and growing up in Alaska is part of who I am. There is that "rugged individualism" that is part of my personality, though I may live it differently than others. There is pride in being from Alaska, even if I don't agree politically with a lot of folks there. It is part of who I am. It is a shame that the picture of Alaska that has been painted for others in the "Lower 48" is still one of redneck/hillbilly stereotypes, especially when people from the Daily Show (which I absolutely love) come up to do a story on Wasilla and hang out at the Mug-Shot Saloon. Definitely not our best image, not our best foot forward. There are people like that there, don't get me wrong--but you miss out on so much of Wasilla, let alone Alaska (and the few years I lived in Anchorage I lived in the most diverse neighborhood I have ever lived in since, and went to school with more people from other countries/cultures/colors than I have ever since, even in Massachusetts).

There is so much more to Alaska and to the Alaskan people than Sarah Palin, but unfortunately, that is not how most people see it. And though I don't agree with Palin on most things, a broken clock is right twice a day--I think the media have harped on her Alaskan-ness long enough. There are plenty of other issues to disagree on and flaws to point out.

One interesting perspective out of all of this: I never, ever again, will have to explain where I am from in Alaska. I will never again say it is a small town just north of Anchorage. Instead, most people now know Wasilla is the Duck Tape and SPAM Capital of the world, using more per capita than anyone else. Few will remember Wasilla as the train depot stop on the way to Denali National Park, the gateway to Hatcher's Pass, and the hometown of the Iditarod Headquarters. Few will know there are two lakes, Wasilla Lake and Lake Lucille (though they know Palin lives on one of the lakes), and in the winter you can go ice skating under the Northern Lights, or go sledding up Hatcher's Pass, and in the summer pick blueberries in the mountains, fishing or rafting on the Little Susitna River just outside of town, or pick wild raspberries just about anywhere. That's the Wasilla I have known, and most will probably never know of it.

Going Rogue...

I just had to use that title. I'll write more on Mrs. Palin's book very soon.

First of all, though, an update: my husband has accepted the position of pastor of the First Christian Church of Durant, Oklahoma. Our last Sundays at our current churches will be January 3rd, and the moving truck will come January 4th. He will start on January 17th. We plan on making a mini-vacation out of our trip to visit family and friends along the way, weather permitting. AJ has already been to 11 states plus D.C., so he will be a well-traveled little boy before he reaches 18 months!

This move is bittersweet for me. I have lived in Massachusetts now for ten years. Most of my friends are here. I also never imagined I would leave my church this soon, as I have loved my ministry at First Baptist and have loved this congregation dearly. They will always be AJ's church family. This congregation has loved us and prayed for us and has been our family to us. I have been very happy here.

But I know from previous experience that it is often when I am comfortable and content, that is when God calls me to something new. I can almost hear God saying, "All right, let's get up and go now!"

I have felt the pull between being a full-time mom and a full-time pastor over the last year. At first, after I went back full-time from maternity leave, I was able to find the balance. I worked from home two days a week and was in the office two days a week. AJ was quite portable back then so when I scheduled visitations I took him with me in the infant seat. He also napped 3 times a day so it made it easy to arrange my schedule around his naps, and he slept through the night from four weeks until six months.

After six months, however, it became more difficult. AJ stopped sleeping through the night, and since I was still nursing I was the one up in the middle of the night and then it would take me hours to fall back asleep. He went down to two naps a day, sometimes only 45 minutes at a time, and by the time I showered and checked my email he would be up again. In order to keep up, I often stayed up until 11 writing my sermons and planning worship, and on the days I was in the office I would stay later, and try to cram in 3-4 visits a day (normally I never plan more than two a day, so I can spend quality time with people and allow for other opportunities for ministry).

AJ has since gone back to sleeping through the night (mostly!) but he is very active these days. I can no longer take him on visits because he gets into everything, and most people's homes are just not childproof, nor are hospitals or nursing homes. I find myself exhausted at times trying to meet the full-time demands of ministry and full-time mommyhood.

I am looking forward to this break in full-time ministry. I am hoping in this transition to not only give more time to AJ, but more time to myself. I have wanted to be an active writer, to keep up this blog at least weekly, to send out articles for publication and perhaps work on that book I have been talking about all these years. I am sensing the opportunities for my own creative growth in new ways through this change in our lives. I am also happy that my husband is finally able to pursue his dream of full-time ministry and get started in his career.

Nonetheless, I am deeply saddened to be leaving full-time ministry. Since I was 13 years old I have known I was called to ministry and I have always envisioned myself as a pastor since that time. One of my great sorrows is that AJ may not know me as a pastor in the same way, to see his mom as the leader of a congregation. Sure, he'll have that experience with his dad, but I think it is something unique about being a pastor-mom. I worry that we will miss out on the experience of having our children grow up with the image of their mom as a spiritual leader, transcending stereotypical pastoral roles. Instead, we seem to be slipping back into the norm, with my husband becoming the full-time pastor (currently he has been part-time and home more with AJ) and I becoming the stay-at-home mom. There is something I feel I am losing in this, though I know I am gaining so much more.

Everyone, and I mean, EVERYONE, tells me how important it is to be home at this age. You can never get these years back, they grow up so fast. I have heard it, and I believe it. I know this is the right decision, but it is bittersweet, and though I am gaining so much, there still is a loss that I am experiencing, both personally and professionally.

Still, I do look forward to having more time to explore, to get in touch with me again, to be home with AJ, to not have to go visit someone in a nursing home where the heat is set at 72 degrees and I've only had 3 hours of sleep and four Diet Cokes to get me through the day. I am glad I no longer have to worry when AJ is not feeling well about who will look after him on a Sunday morning because neither parent could stay home. I do look forward to being there when AJ goes off to school and comes home for the day. I look forward to a slower pace of life. And most importantly, I am glad that this is not a permanent change. I do believe I will return to pastoral ministry, and I know there are many other ministries I will be involved in, even as a stay-at-home mom.

Moment of Surrender--a review of U2's 360 tour

(pictures taken from my phone--not great, but not bad!)

My body’s now a begging bowl

That’s begging to get back, begging to get back

To my heart

To the rhythm of my soul

To the rhythm of my unconsciousness

To the rhythm that yearns

To be released from control

I attended last night’s show in Foxborough, and once again, U2 has completely blown me away. For the first time in my life I was able to get general admission tickets and was on the floor, right by the stage, and though at times the view was blocked other times Bono, the Edge and Adam Clayton were literally standing feet above me (never got close to Larry, though).

I have mentioned to several friends how disappointed I was with the latest album, No Line on the Horizon. I really didn’t think it stood up to the rest of their body of work, though I still maintain POP is my least favorite; but just like POP, they have reinvented many of these songs for the live stage and I was completely caught off-guard.

Luckily for me and my husband, we didn’t have to stand in line to get a good place on the floor. We stood in line maybe twenty minutes before they let us in and we were still able to get on the inside of the circular outer stage. The stage itself was constructed with a huge speaker, light and projection system in the shape of a rocket ship. Snow Patrol (another Irish band) was the opening act and they were pretty good, though I wasn’t familiar with them. They had a lot of fun and on one of their songs the entire U2 road crew came out on stage with them and were sort of the “backup” dancers—pretty funny!

As U2 prepared to come on, while the lights of the stadium were still on, smoke began to blow out of the “rocket” and David Bowie’s “Major Tom” came on. Then the lights went out and U2 took the stage, beginning with “Magnificent.”

As I said, I was disappointed with this album and even listened to it on the way to the concert after not having listened for a couple of months, hoping that my feelings would change but they hadn’t. The live versions, however, were incredible, especially “I’ll Go Crazy If I Don’t Go Crazy Tonight” (otherwise known as the Blackberry song). Led by Larry on the conga, there was an entire new vibe to this song as they four of them went out onto the circular stage, passing right over us. What was perhaps more amazing were the places I had first perceived as lyrical weaknesses on the part of Bono were strengths live—it seemed to fall into place and make sense and didn’t seem awkward at all—I experienced this most greatly in “Unknown Caller” and “Moment of Surrender,” the closing song of the show. “Get On Your Boots” was good live, but still not one of my favorites, I’ll admit.

I loved the way the set was woven together, old favorites and new songs, with this theme of seeing the whole world in a different point of view. Old songs such as “The Unforgettable Fire,” “MLK,” and “Ultraviolet” haven’t been heard in years—and “Your Blue Room,” from the Passengers CD they did with Brian Eno in the 90’s was never done (as far as I know) live before. There were the old standby’s, of course—“I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For,” “Sunday Bloody Sunday,” “Where The Streets Have No Name,” “One,” and “With Or Without You.” Bono and The Edge also performed a moving acoustic version of “Stay” which they’ve done in the past.

Just about every U2 concert I have been to has had some sort of social message, and some sort of sermon from Bono. But I don’t think there has been a more powerful message than the one on this tour. Bono said in the beginning of the concert with this whole new stage setup that it was about being closer to the people, and that it required a lot more of them, and now, “we are going to require a lot more from you.” And he was right. There was a message about care for the earth during “Your Blue Room.” There was a personal message from Desmond Tutu (pre-recorded, of course) calling us to be One, to work together, and Bono spoke of nonviolent action and DATA (Debt Aids Trade Relief) and the work of getting vaccinations and AIDS medications to people in Africa.

But the pivotal point for me was during the song “Walk On.” On the All You Can’t Leave Behind album in the linear notes it dedicates “Walk On” to Aung San Suu Kyi, Burma’s elected president who has been under house arrest for almost 14 years now. U2 has continually raised awareness on the dictatorship and oppression in Burma, now called Myanmar under this regime, though the world seems to forget about her. In Massachusetts we have many Karen refugees from Burma, an ethnic group that is under siege along with many other minority ethnic groups there. So on this tour, if you have general admission tickets they give you a mask with Aung San Suu Kyi’s face on it to wear during “Walk On.” And certain folks that signed up for the ONE Campaign were brought up on stage to parade around with those masks with her face on it.

Words are useless in trying to describe it because it just sounds like a nice demonstration. Words cannot describe watching Burmese refugees walk up on stage with Aung Kyi’s face, knowing that they have survived and escaped to America. I was moved to tears.

My husband said probably most of those people signed up on the campaign simply so they could get up on stage—that is probably true—but I saw at least one Burmese refugee and I’m sure there were others who believe in this cause. And now tens of thousands have witnessed this demonstration on one night alone. I felt moved to pray, I felt moved to walk, I felt moved to stand up. “Stand up for your love.”

Bono invoked God’s presence—he said, “We are in the presence of God tonight, and Tom Brady.” There was humor, of course, but there was reality. Bono led us in singing “Amazing Grace” before “Where the Streets.” Bono repeated the line in “City of Blinding Lights,” “Some pray for, others steal, blessings not just for the ones who kneel… blessings not just for those who kneel… luckily…” and then he knelt down.

Again, words don’t do it justice. But I felt empowered and moved in a way I have not felt in church in a long time. This is what church is supposed to be like—we are supposed to get excited, to feel empowered by the Holy Spirit, and to go out and do justice, love kindness and walk humbly with our God. Bono may seem at times anything but humble; however, if you’ve read his speech at the Presidential Prayer Breakfast from a few years ago, or heard him speak about the months he spent volunteering in an Ethiopian orphanage, or watched him promote DATA and the ONE Campaign and Jubilee 2000 looking to lift the debt from African countries, you know that somewhere behind those signature shades there is a touch of humility and a recognition that he has to use what he has to do good in this world.

U2 is anything but perfect—if they were a perfect band, they wouldn’t allow Ticketmaster/Live Nation to charge the outrageous prices they do, they probably wouldn’t partner up with iPod and Blackberry as corporate sponsors of their songs; but they do try to do the right thing. Through their tours they get people involved in these important organizations working to eliminate debt in African countries that keeps the poor people down and away from life-saving vaccines. They promote nonviolent action in the ways that Martin Luther King, Jr. lived out. They lift up the voice of Desmond Tutu as they have since the Artists Against Apartheid movement. And they speak out for Aung San Suu Kyi and the Burmese peoples and they don’t let us forget when we’d like to just come and enjoy a couple hours of music. As Bono said, “we’re going to require a lot of you.”

This is what church should be: great music/worship experience, great fellowship, great message, and an empowering message yet the challenge to go out and do justice in this world. That is the essence of what church should be. But I don’t think preachers should try to be Bono—in fact, I don’t think that’s what he’d want at all. Rather, the rock star should be Jesus, and the preachers should be the master sound technician—making sure the message is received loud and clear. And if the people tithed as much as they shell out for a rock concert, perhaps we could be the “chance to change the world.”

I know, I’m biased. I’m a huge U2 fan and have been for years. But this was the best concert I’ve ever been to, and I’ll be damned if that wasn’t church I experienced last night.